My Thoughts...Finally !!

Though I named my blog Hashina's thoughts.. I guess I never shared my thoughts here..better for you..coz you wont ever understand my thoughts or you can never relate to it perhaps..or you wont even feel that these things are to be thought about :P

Its been a while,I wrote something not because nothing special happened in my life, life is indeed a procession of events..even I had many things which should have been shared n published here..but I guess somethings are better left unsaid!!

So, the latest news is that I am going for a vaccation..hold on.. I really doubt if its a vaccation..no its not ,not at all..I am having a great vaccation here in Dubai..am having so much fun here..so much time here for my own little things..and having so much time to be lazy !! But as soon as I land home, I would be busy I guess...have to tolerate many so called "relatives&neighbours" have to live up to many expectations..have to live many roles other than being a wife..have to be a daughter,a sister,an aunt,a daughter in law, sister in law..a neighbour,a friend,a classmate,college mate,batch mate..a student..oopssss and I have only a fortnight for all these roles !! it seems I am gonna have a tough time indeed..

But I should mention the love and care am gonna get back home too...its really admirable and I wont get it here for sure..so it can balance every other draw backs..being home :P

But Guess what...I am not at all excited about my trip :( am not at all happy to go home..I still wonder why..may be the freedom,the bliss I have here..or may be am afraid of the events coming up..I have my sister's hosue warming,my cousin's wedding,my husband's cousin's wedding then my cousin's engagement..College Alumni..and the worst part is that I love being there..but I dont want to face many of them :(

In my initial years here, I have always wanted to go home,wanted to spend more time back home,had so many nostalgic things to do..I didnt like Dubai at all..like any other NRI , I was also overwhelmed with so many feelings when the flight lands on the run way..you cant explain the feeling we have when the cabin crew announces the landing,the out side temperature etc..and then follows the mobile notification sounds..the welcome messages by the inumerable service providers back home..then the messages from our own Etisalat n Du..the number n contact details of UAE embassy etc etc then to see the excitement of our fellow passengers to take out the hand baggages,the duty free shop bags,which they bought at the last moment for their loved one's back home..its indeed a great feeling to be back home :-)

But I guess am more excited,when the flight lands back here in Dubai now !! I feel am home..whenever the flight lands on Dubai airport runway ! Still wondering when Dubai became my home,when the 2 bed room flat here became my world..when I got used to the extreme weather here..when I started to love to explore the food varities here..when I started to love the walk around the length n breadth of malls here...and most of all when I started to be proud to be a part of UAE !

Oh God.... how proirities and opinions change on time..I still cant stop wondering..what are the things here that keeps me happy..,that keeps me wanting to come back here..may be Dubai gave me a life of my own..may be I started living my own here..back home we are living not only our lives..but of many..we are sharing our lives back home..we are indeed a social animal back home...

And the ultimate truth is that I have become more SELFISH !! Though not a pleasant thing to be shared..its the fact..

Love,
Hash